Assignment #9 Performed on 10/20

Safiya Martinez
CW 602—Professor Conboy
Assignment #9



Julian and Arianna sit together. She is helping him study. On the surface, it appears that they have an antagonistic relationship, and in some ways they do. Julian has a huge crush on Arianna, but it is not returned. She likes some of the attention, but he often goes too far and she checks him. But when they are in synch, they have genuine moments as friends. She helps him with homework, and he swears his undying love.



ARIANNA
Julian… Are you serious? You can’t read that? Try it again.

JULIAN
Arrriaaaaaannnnnnnaaaaaa!
Why you always trying to play somebody?
I’m trying. I’m trying my best. Damn.

ARIANNA
I’m not coming at you; it’s just that—
that sentence is type simple.

JULIAN
That’s why I hate doing my homework with you, man.
You fuckin mean.

ARIANNA
Try it again.

JULIAN
Nah—I’m not—

ARIANNA
Well if you’re not gonna try I’m leaving. My average sucks too. And I could be catching myself up instead of helping you.

JULIAN
That’s what I don’t understand… You can do the work, but you don’t even try.
If this was even a little easier for me, I’d be a beast, you don’t even know!

ARIANNA
Well, I’m lazy.

JULIAN
Come here, lazy.

[JULIAN flicks her ponytail with his hand]

ARIANNA
Stop it, Julian.

JULIAN
I don’t want to touch your hair anyway. Your shit is choppin down my fingers. I got splinters and shit.

ARIANNA
Shut up, Julian!

JULIAN
For real, what you put in that?

ARIANNA
Fuck you—

JULIAN
For once I’m being serious. You need a perm, yo.

[Arianna self-consciously touches her hair]

ARIANNA
I KNOW you’re not talking, with your arid braids cracklin on some campfire status.

JULIAN
You not ready to roast me… Don’t even start. You will LOSE, Arianna! This is what I do!

ARIANNA
That’s why your—

JULIAN
You WILL LOSE!

ARIANNA
….Same pair of sneakers everyday that I can smell from here.

JULIAN
So what, SO WHAT????!!!! You think those
SEVEN JEANS will hide the fact that your butt looks like a bread.

ARIANNA
My butt looks like a bread?

JULIAN
Your butt looks like a bread.

ARIANNA
Get the fuck outta here.
What that even means?

JULIAN
…That in the titties you all big and square and humpty-dumpty and shit,
And then your body gets real little like the last piece of bread in the pack. Little rectangle and shit. Humpty-dumpty no havin ass. Get some butt pads Arianna.

TEACHER
This is a study hall. Work or leave.

JULIAN and ARIANNA
WE’RE STUDYING, DAMN!!!!

JULIAN
For real… why you don’t give me a chance?
I’m faithful, I’m loyal, I walk all my girlfriends to the park, and back home and shit.

ARIANNA
Girlfriends? You just have them nasty slides in Honduras
when you go on vacation in the summer time.

JULIAN
So what, that’s practice? Listen…
… I would never leave you, even if you hit me.

ARIANNA
You’re so stupid.

JULIAN
For real, you could get mad scratch me up, throwing fists and shit when we fight and
argue and all that, and I’d just put on my backpack, all calm cool and collective and bounce.

ARIANNA
You are really retarded.

JULIAN
It’s that you drive me crazy, Arianna.

ARIANNA
I gotta go. I’m already late. My moms is gonna be beastin when I get home.
Study date over.

JULIAN
So this was a date?

ARIANNA
This was not a date, pendejo.
See you tomorrow.


[She leaves]

JULIAN
[Calling after her]
This was a date!!!!
… You know it was…